The Alibi Room buzzed with the usual Sunday morning crowd—Kev slinging beers, V sorting through receipts, and the regulars nursing their hangovers. Suddenly, the door slammed open.
Frank Gallagher stumbled in, wild-eyed and clutching a battered tablet. He climbed onto his infamous soap stool, cleared his throat, and bellowed:
“Ladies and degenerates, lend me your ears!”
The bar fell silent, all eyes on Frank.
“I have seen the truth, and it is more twisted than a Milkovich family reunion! We’re being manipulated, controlled from the inside out!”
He waved the tablet above his head.
“This video—this digital oracle—has opened my eyes. The system is rigged, the game fixed, and we’re the pawns!”
Kev leaned over to V and whispered, “What’s he on about now?”
“They’ve got us chasing our tails, believing we’re free while they pull the strings. But I won’t be their puppet! I see the wires, the lies, the deceit!”
Frank’s voice rose to a crescendo, his arms flailing dramatically.
“But fear not, my fellow Alibi patrons! For I, Frank Gallagher, shall lead the charge against this invisible tyranny! Who’s with me?”
A moment of silence followed. Then, from the back, Kermit raised his glass.
“To Frank, the only man who can find a conspiracy in a cat video!”
The bar erupted in laughter and cheers. Frank beamed, soaking in the attention.
“Thank you, thank you! Remember, stay vigilant, question everything, and never trust a cat on the internet!”
With that, he stepped down, grabbed a beer from the counter, and took a triumphant swig. The Alibi returned to its usual clamor, the patrons shaking their heads and chuckling at Frank’s latest revelation.
And so, the legend of Frank Gallagher’s digital awakening was born, another tale to be retold over countless drinks at the Alibi Room.