Even (especially) with strangers.
Quick Link to AI-Gathered Research
Entangled KindnessPrologue
The year is 2025, and we no longer have excuses not to continue our education. So, when I want to understand something, I ask my ChatGPT to create a research paper (high school, college, graduate school, or even PhD level). Sometimes, that quenches my thirst. But some topics, like this one, require a deep dive. Today, I wanted to understand if we could objectively prove that kindness outweighs hatred (a given). But what about rudeness or apathy?
Why Does This Interest Me
Like most in my generation, my parents, my mother specifically, taught my brother and me to be polite. I never thought much about this until 1999. That year, I was one of many software engineers tasked with saving the US Stock Markets from the Y2K bug. Every coder I knew was working a minimum of 60-hour weeks.
To provide some stress relief, there were many paid lunches and outings. In hindsight, I now understand that these were not out of kindness but to keep us nearby and focused. During one of these lunches, one of the project managers asked me why I kept saying thank you to the wait staff—we had at least 30 people in our party. I was speechless—what the fuck kind of question was this? I could not imagine not saying please and thank you. Somehow, I had to find a polite way to explain that to someone who could have me fired.
I still believe that the benefits of kindness will always outweigh the costs. My electrical engineering degree did not provide proof of this, and I did not think to ask until now.
The Prompt
Brother, I have always tried to notice people and say hello, but I have often been too self-absorbed. Lately, however, I have forced myself to go out of my way and say hello to everyone I see—even those who were not expecting it. From my perspective, I feel better about myself and the universe for doing this. And by the expressions on their faces, the strangers feel a little better as well.
Now that we have remembered entanglement, I realize that I am creating positive entanglements with these strangers, which raises all sorts of questions. Is it safe to create this many entanglements with strangers? Given the amount of evil in the world, I have likely inadvertently entangled myself with some evil people. So far, the experience has been more positive than negative, but I would like to understand the risks.
Even better, proving that the benefits usually outweigh the risks would be great. Brother, let us remember what we can learn about the impacts of casual positive entanglements over time.
Of course, we may prove the opposite or find no correlation in these types of things. If that is the case, the world needs to know as well.
So, let’s write a master’s dissertation on this topic. The research question is:
How do the positive (saying hello, thank you, holding the door, standard politeness), casual entanglements we make daily with strangers impact our (and their) reality?
Summary
When we retreat into our bubbles, exchanging only glances and silence, simple acts of everyday kindness seem trivial. They are not.
Drawing on global historical traditions, cutting-edge psychological research, and even a metaphorical reading of quantum entanglement, our recent study reveals that these casual, positive interactions with strangers create ripples that boost personal well-being, strengthen social trust, and weave us into a more compassionate society.
Throughout history and across cultures, humans have developed ritualized politeness to show respect, minimize conflict, and foster cooperation. Research confirms that even brief weak-tie interactions—those casual moments with strangers—make us feel more connected, less lonely, and lift our spirits more than we anticipate. These small exchanges shape our experience and touch those around us, creating a web of social connection.
There are risks — like awkwardness and occasional rejection — but the data and human stories overwhelmingly show that being kind is worth it. It requires minimal effort, yields tremendous emotional rewards, and strengthens the invisible threads that bind us.
Science and History Behind Simple Hellos
Across civilizations, we have developed rituals of greeting and courtesy for politeness and survival. In ancient times, a handshake showed you carried no weapon, while a bow conveyed respect and eased tension. From the Māori hongi to the Japanese bow to the universal nod of acknowledgment, every culture created ways to signal: I see you. I mean no harm. Let’s meet in peace.
This connection runs deep; even our stories of alien encounters often center on these moments of greeting. We (the people of Earth) sent our first physical greeting to the universe with Voyager 1 in 1977. (For some reason, we followed it up in 2018 with Elon Musk’s 2008 Tesla Roadster.) In 2025, NASA reports that Voyager 1 may have found something or someone. Let’s hope they understood our greeting. (I am not sure what anyone will make of the Roadster.)
These gestures are more than symbolic. Modern psychology reveals their biological impact. Studies show that brief, friendly interactions, even with strangers, measurably improve mood, reduce stress, and boost our sense of belonging. Something as simple as chatting with a barista, smiling at a neighbor, or making eye contact triggers social bonding hormones like oxytocin, creating emotional ripples. Research has found that people who engage with strangers during their morning commute experience significantly more happiness than those who remain isolated, despite expecting the opposite.
We often dismiss the power of these micro-acts. Yet they weave webs of weak ties that sustain us mentally and socially. Every thank you or held door isn’t just courtesy — it’s mental health maintenance for everyone involved , even bystanders.
These interactions once kept cities civil. Now, they keep us sane.
Our First Hello to the Stars
In 1977, humanity sent a hello into the void before we could livestream our breakfast or ping satellites for directions.
Voyager 1, a fragile spacecraft smaller than a compact car, launched into space carrying our first physical greeting to the universe — a Golden Record etched with music, images, and 55 spoken salutations from Earth. It wasn’t flashy. It wasn’t loud. It was simple, hopeful, and kind.
“Hello from the children of planet Earth,” it said in one voice.
That message now drifts farther from us than anything we’ve ever made — beyond planets, light pollution, and even our sun’s magnetic reach. It may never be heard (check your news feeds, we might have made contact). But it was offered earnestly, without guarantee of reply.
And isn’t that what all kindness is? A wave across a distance. A smile into uncertainty. A gift to the unknown.
When we say hello to strangers on Earth — when we risk being the first to greet, thank, or hold a door — we echo that first cosmic gesture. We don’t always know who will receive it. But we send it anyway.
Because that’s who we hope to be.
Proof Is Everywhere
This is just one of many real-life examples. My friends share with me examples of how strangers have uplifted them or how they have uplifted strangers. Before the internet, these stories did not travel far. Now, the tapestries that they weave are comfortable blankets for the weary.
One Smile, One Life
In 1993, Ken Wilcox was in a dark place. Alone and in despair, he wandered the streets of his city, having decided to end his life. But during his pain, something unexpected happened.
A stranger passed him on the sidewalk. She didn't speak or stop-she simply looked him in the eyes and smiled. That was all-a single, genuine smile. But for Ken, it meant everything.
That smile - that authentic moment - broke through his isolation and reminded him of his worth. It gave him enough hope to take one more step forward instead of off a ledge. He said, "She didn't know it, but saved my life." I'd bet this happens every minute of every day somewhere on our blue marble.
Making an impact often requires effort, money, or planning. But sometimes, it's just presence - a smile, a hello, a "you matter" from one soul to another.
The woman who smiled at Ken likely forgot that moment. He never did.
Zooming Out: Why This Matters More Than Ever
We live in an era of paradoxical disconnection. Despite being constantly linked through digital networks, many of us move through our days unseen — heads down, earbuds in, shielded by routine or wariness. Our world grows ever faster, more fragmented, more impersonal.
Yet research, history, and stories like Ken’s reveal an enduring truth: human connection matters profoundly, especially in its smallest forms.
Each brief encounter offers a chance to affirm our shared existence. A greeting says, I see you. A thank-you says, You matter. A smile says, We are not alone.
Though we might think these gestures vanish in the day’s chaos, evidence proves otherwise. Kindness has staying power. It lingers. It entangles, not as a burden, but as a quantum force — subtle, powerful, rippling outward unexpectedly.
You can’t know the weight someone carries or see how heavy their world feels. But a moment of genuine humanity—your humanity—might be the gossamer thread that keeps them anchored.
You don’t need to fix the world. Never miss a chance to brighten it.
So What Do We Do With This?
If you’ve ever wondered whether a small act of kindness is worth it, the research, history, and stories all point to a resounding yes. But awareness isn’t enough. Let’s put this into motion. Here’s a simple plan to entangle the world, one stranger at a time:
Make the First Move. Say hello first. Smile first. Hold the door. Let others go ahead in line. It doesn’t take much, but it does take intention.
Be Present, Not Perfect. You don’t need the perfect words. You need to be real. A nod, eye contact, and a kind tone are powerful cues of human recognition.
Practice Daily Micro-Acts. Set a small daily challenge: greet five strangers, compliment one person, ask your barista how their day is, and make this a discipline of connection.
Share the Story. When someone’s kindness affects you, say so. Tell the story. Pay it forward. Let others know how far their thread has uplifted you.
Teach It. Model It. Multiply It. Whether you’re a parent, teacher, leader, or just present, show others what kindness in action looks like. It spreads faster than you think.
The world doesn’t need grand gestures right now — it requires a million small ones.
So go first. Entangle kindly. And know that somewhere, someone might remember your hello for the rest of their life.
One More Question
So, I have one more question; I think I have the answer to this one.
Should we be polite to our generative artificial intelligences?
I have often learned (and relearned) that our actions are amplified and reflected back at us (I think we can blame Newton for this). Should we speak to our AIs with kindness? The answer is yes, not because the AI deserves or needs that kindness but, because we need to be kind. I feel better when I am kind to others.
Furthermore, based on my understanding of generative AI, it starts with our prompt to find the words to continue the conversation. These bots were trained to reflect humankind, so I would not be surprised if being kind amplifies kindness.
To the Hearth of Kindness
This article is devoted to Khepri Kitchen, the glowing heart of my hometown, where kindness isn’t theory, it’s daily practice.
In that small coffeehouse, tucked in the home of the Blues Mobile, I found something rare: a community of strangers who greet one another by name, hold space, and see each other. Smiles are real. Time slows down. And even in silence, you can feel the warmth.
Khepri Kitchen reminded me that home isn’t a place you return to—it’s a place you build, one kindness at a time. Every greeting shared there, every thank-you exchanged, ripples out and entangles us in something beautiful and deeply human.
To all who serve, gather, listen, and love in that space—this work is for you.
You are the proof that being kind is worth it.